Of the Devil

Introduction:

I am fed up with this stuff. I can not believe the stuff I’m fed up with. So I have started a book called: “Of the Devil” which you are about to read. I will be constantly updating this, hopefully you will enjoy this and read it. These all come in a random order, nothing specific just whatever comes to mind. If you have any suggestions you can leave it the comments. If you are offended you may also leave a comment. I don’t know why you’d feel offended but you are free to be offended at whatever you want to be offended by. Enjoy.

 

  1. Cokeacola: Coke is of the devil just because they have a polar bear as their mascot!!!
  2. Puzzles with flora of any kind. I just can’t do them.
  3. People who drive Hummers: When these normally nice people get behind the wheel of a Hummer, they turn into the devil incarnate.  GET OFF THE ROAD, YOU GAS-GUZZLING DEMONS!!!
  4. Drivers who drive badly.
  5. Spongebob Squarepants
  6. Patience: They say, “Patience is a virtue.” but come on!!! Who in today’s world is actually virtuous?
  7. Animals that I am allergic to: Animals that I am allergic to are of the devil for obvious reasons.
  8. Most animals that I’m not allergic to: as you can see, I’m not much of an animal lover.
  9. Video games: they kill the mind, slowly and brutally.
  10. Taylor S. and Katelyn B.: They use their iPod nanos as a microphone. Anyone else who does this may add their name to the list.
  11. Sanjaya: his hair is ugly, he can’t sing. And he’s an embarrassment to Washington, which is where I am from.
  12. Jason Castro: he stinks at guitar and ukulele, his hair is ugly, and he definitely can’t sing.
  13. Ashley D.: Kind of annoying. Wait, strike that, it’s not a “kind of” it is.
  14. The guy in “Raise You’re Voice” that dropped the cello. Instrument abuse of any kind is not tolerated.
  15. The saying: “Your face!”
  16. Mosquitoes: Those blood sucking creatures.
  17. Spam: The junk mail and the canned ham.
  18. Blueberries: How deceptive! They taste great but they turn your mouth blue. How many fruit are out there like that though?
  19. McDonalds: They and many other fast food restaurants are partially responsible for Americans being obese. How do you guys sleep at night?!
  20. Wal-Mart: Every five feet one is accosted by a person offering to help. ”How may I help you?”
  21. Lowes: Those preppy imposters hide stuff and make their customers search for them without even offering helping. At least Wal-Mart offers too often.
  22. Drake and Josh (The show): Annoying!
  23. Zumiez: That store is for losers who can’t skate.
  24. People with up-turned collars. This is self-explanatory.
  25. Plaid clothing.
  26. People who come into the middle conversations and pretend to know what everyone is talking about. It’s just plain rude!
  27. Breathy singing. It really annoys me, although I know some people think that it’s a nice sounding thing. Yuck!
  28. People who use cheat codes on video games. Unfortunately, I am one of these people, but I do hate using cheat codes. I just can’t beat video games without them.
  29. Generic mp3 players. It should be illegal to own a generic mp3 player. iPod all the way!
  30. People who use scented hand sanitizer in an enclosed space. I guess even unscented hand sanitizer in an enclosed space is annoying too.
  31. Canadian people who shop at U.S. stores. It annoys me to no end when I receive my change and I find Canadian pennies.
  32. People who tip badly. Since my first job was a tip basis only; it frustrated me when I would bag $500 worth of groceries. Then receive a $5 tip! Hello people, at least a $20!
  33. People who shout while they’re talking on bluetooths. You don’t have to shout. Bluetooths have a slightly more sensitive microphone than cell phones.
  34. Hannah Montana. There are obvious reasons. She’s just really annoying.
  35. Miley Cyrus. That Hannah Montana want-a-be.
  36. Tony Stark (Robert Downy Jr.): He fell through a piano on one of the test flights for his new suit.
  37. Cats: they are of the devil, plain and simple.
  38. Hospital and airport vending machines: they are so grossly overpriced, it’s not even funny. The truth is: all vending machines are overpriced.
  39. Guys who belly dance. This one is a duh moment.
  40. People who think they own the road while they drive. Although I have this mindset, it’s ok. I’m a teenager what else would you expect?
  41. Chocolate. This sour treat is nasty, but this is just an opinion.
  42. Clowns. They’re just plain scary.
  43. Plastic bags. When people say that they want plastic because they don’t want to kill trees I want to slap them. Plastic bags will sit in landfills forever.
  44. Crocs….no one should wear these.
  45. Movies that are stereotypical.
  46. Siblings. (Joking!)
  47. Electrical cords. They’re always in the way. As a matter of fact, all cables are annoying…everything should be cordless.
  48. When people plan an instrument so far out of tune and they think it’s still in tune! AHHHHHH! It’s super annoying on youtube.com. As a matter of fact you can visit my page: www.youtube.com/concertpianist15
  49. People who think they know it all, and don’t.
  50. White people who think they can be black gangsters…yeah. I’ve probably offended lots of people with this one.
  51. When people use microphones with cords for cordless microphones. (Not mine, from Chicken Pop Pod, hope you don’t mind me using it. But it is truely annoying.) It’s from Sunday School Musical…which is probably of the Devil itself.
  52. People who don’t vote. I think if you’re eligable to vote you should, it’s your responsibility.
  53. Puns. Although I laugh at puns the most I can’t stand them.
  54. Commercials. Honestly does anyone like watching them, except for during the Superbowl when companies actually put good money into advertising. The only commercials I like are the freecreditreport.com ones.

 

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4 responses

20 04 2009
Tim

Interesting stuff.

27 05 2009
Ayesha

You are too funny! Thanks for the laughs!

15 06 2009
Colby

I mostly agree with you!

19 01 2010
crazyscribbler2010

Cool list! Very Interesting read… It made me laugh all the way 🙂

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